Time to get Obsessed.

Is it just me.. or is it that every celebrity with PCOS is super fit/thin?  (By every celebrity with PCOS I clearly just mean Victoria Beckham and Jillian Michaels… I don’t know of any other celebrities with this bullshit).  Regardless, Victoria and Jillian are as fit as can be– some may be spiteful and even say anorexic looking.  But, have you seen before and after pictures?  The bodies they have now are not the bodies that they used to have.  It’s very clear that they felt the need to shape up– and I can only imagine it’s because of the PCOS factor…

Bread is my Frienemy.

Breaking up is hard to do.

I love Bread.  We hang out.  I can say that I have a very personal relationship with Bread.  We have always been there for each other.  I like to dip Bread in oil.  Oil with spices.  I like Bread for breakfast.  Bread with Lunch.  Bread with dinner.  Bread dipped in cheese.  Bread dipped in gravy.  In fact, if I could only eat one thing for the rest of my life– I’d probably want it to be Bread with things to dip in it or put on top of it.  Now, I am not discriminatory.  All because Bread doesn’t look like it’s Bread-self, doesn’t mean I won’t eat it.  I like Bread when it’s in its cracker form and in its pasta form as well.  Bread. Bread. Bread. But Bread has been misbehaving… and we are now Frienemies.

Travel to a Far Away Land Without Leaving Your Backyard.

This is how you do it.

Books.  I said it.  BOOKS.  Most people would prefer to sit on the couch and watch some TV– I’m telling you that TV sucks.  Books are where it’s at.  I’ve had quite a bit of time to myself these past few weeks (I’m a childless teacher, that means I spend summer finding ways to entertain myself) and I have knocked out six books so far– all of which take me to another place, allow me to be someone else for a while, and let me explore worlds I’d never known existed.  This is essential for us infertiles.  Sometimes it can be hard not to focus on our situations, but books allow you some freedom from all the BS that is infertility.  This is how you read a book as an infertile in the summer….

I’m Back!

So, I’ve been on a small hiatus lately.  I’ve been gone because I thought it would help me relax if I wasn’t thinking about it all the time (yes, relax, as in “just relax and it will happen”… now I know FOR SURE it’s bullshit, but hey, I’m willing to try anything).  I was getting a bit sad that the femara wasn’t working, and I was afraid that I was thinking about the whole PCOS thing too much and maybe stressing about it was hindering me from getting pregnant… it wasn’t.  I am still as barren as an 80 year old woman with her tubes tied trying to get pregnant– even with much effort to try and forget!  So here I am, ready to stop being sad again and start being happy, and continue on attempts to awaken these silly ovaries!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?!?!

6DPO… It’s Friday, gonna open a bottle of wine… Decide to take a test JUST IN CASE… I know it’s too early… BUT LOOK AT THIS?! Can this be real? It’s a dollar tree test… I’m trying not to scream and yell incase it’s a god awful terrible mistake… Has this happened to anyone? Isn’t it too early? IS THIS MY BFP?!?! OPK smiled on CD13… It’s CD19… CAN THIS BE TRUE?

***UPDATE: I’m an idiot and in my desperation to not be infertile, I accidentally grabbed the dollar tree’s “ovulation predictor” rather than the pregnancy test. My happiness was short lived and has been replaced with feelings of stupidness.

Infertility is Confusing.

This is how I feel.

PCOS and infertility is confusing.  I had finally gotten my first happy face and we made the most of it 🙂 … however, at 3DPO I began spotting… and now, at 4DPO I am STILL spotting.  Spotting enough that when I went to the beach today I had to wear a “lite days” tampon (you know, the purple ones..) What gives?!  It’s too late for ovulation bleeding, it’s too early for implantation bleeding, and I’m taking femara which is supposed to make me ovulate and give me a regular cycle…. I. Am. So. Confused.   Why is there blood?!   WTF?!

Just like Samoa Girl Scout Cookies, but Gluten Free and Paleo

These look so amazingly delicious, and while I can’t yet vouch for them… (mostly because I’d make them immediately but I don’t have cocoa powder) I will be able to tell your about their deliciousness very soon. Awesome post Vegetarian Wife!

Vegetarian Wife's Blog

Paleo Samoa Girl Scout Cookies

Samoa’s are one of my favorite Girl Scout Cookies, so I was very happy to find this recipe. I made these at Christmas and this recipe is a  replicate of Samoa Girl Scout Cookies that is Gluten Free and Paleo.  This was another bit hit with Veggie Hubby and our neighbors.  I couldn’t find the original posting on the internet for this recipe or I would give credit to the original poster.

This recipe made 24 cookies.  My only change from the original is I forgot to indent the cookies in step 5 below.  This recipe is quick to make and only has 6 ingredients!

Ingredients:

• 2 Cups of unsweetened, shredded coconut
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract
• 1/2 cup raw honey
• 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder (dark chocolate)
• 1 tablespoon coconut oil

Instructions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees
2. Line baking pan with…

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Enjoying this Art Thing.

My SECOND Painting.  “Hold On.”

I’m totally enjoying this art thing.  I’m not all that good at it, but it makes me feel creative (and I’m not naturally creative). Feeling creative is exciting!  No wonder people want to be artists!  Not to mention it is total therapy for me right now.  I can get out all my silly feelings about this infertile business while still putting my mind to good use.   All my cysters, you should try this.

Find a New Hobby– like pretending to be an artist!

My First Painting! “Sleeping Ovaries”

I have had this silly inkling for a few months now where I just felt like I wanted to paint.  I am not an artist and the only painting I’ve ever done has been at Wine & Design (which is amazing by the way– wine, paint.. need I say more?).  I can’t describe this silly feeling to create something or just make a total mess.  I just felt like doing it.

Baby Showers can be FUN for Infertiles!

Baby Shower Day!  Believe it or not, I am super excited to be going to a baby shower.  Stop rolling your eyes my infertile cysters and hold those tears in– hear me out before you start thinking I’m crazy! One of my friends who lives down the street will be having a baby boy in August and today is her shower.  Also down the street are two other very lucky ladies who are sporting baby bumps– one is about 5 months and the other only made the announcement the other day.  I am surrounded by pregnancy!  I am hoping for some good ju ju today.  I want their pregnancy ju ju all over me– I want to be bathed in all things baby to make my mind happy which will trick my body into being happy which will make my ovaries wake up and make eggs!